Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Six

Somehow summer has disappeared and fall has quietly crept up on me, bringing with it this day once again. 6 years ago today we were given a most precious gift and I will always look on this day with bittersweet memories. It occurred to me today that we have now marked as many birthdays without Noah as we did with him here on earth. Which means that one day very soon we will have spent more days grieving than he lived. I wonder how time can be so harsh...

My little man, I miss you so much and I would give everything to have you here. I will never forget the moment you were born...my heart overflowed with awe and joy. You were beautiful and perfect to me in every way. I was so proud to be your mom.

We sent you balloons today. One blue balloon slipped away as we were getting ready to release them. With disappointment we watched it fly to the heavens, and I couldn't help but think of how your life slipped away so quickly, no matter how I tried to hang on. My selfish heart wants you here with me...I will always long for the life I had with you. But I know you are enjoying a celebration far beyond what I could ever imagine. Happy Birthday precious boy.

Love your mama.

4 comments:

Jamie said...

Thought of you guys today - that does seem strange to realize he's had the same amount of birthdays since his death as he did before...

Anonymous said...

How well I remember that day 6 years ago. And the feelings the first time I saw this tiny miracle! Miss him so much! Love, Gramma L.

Anonymous said...

I admire you so much Nichole. Your ability to be so vulnerable and so honest. 6 years! It seems like yesterday, and yet time has a way of moving so quickly. I am reminded of Revelation 21:4, which says that God will wipe away every tear, and there will be no more heartache, no more sorrow, no more death, and there will be no more enemy!!! You will walk hand in hand once again with Noah, and wwith Jesus. We miss him too,and we love you so much. Mom

Sparklehal said...

Nichole, the story of your family has definitely touched my heart. It has been 13 years since my son passed and I just want to reach out and hug you because I know how you feel. God's blessings to you and yours!